It truly is a GLORIOUS DAY

April 13th 2019 ( Friday).

It truly is a GLORIOUS DAY today as it was a year ago to the day that i found the lump in my right breast.  Who would have known then what the year had ahead for us all.  Defiantly not me.  This time last year I didn’t know i had cancer and look at me now, No cancer.  Big fat smiley face.

It was a battle that i had to fight, there were a lot of rounds and a few knocks along the way but I caught it and I WON.

I am here to tell the tale and to say that i have now done a journey.  But this journey is the one i mentioned right at the beginning of me writing this blog and here i am ……………….view from our balcony,

In Glorious Antigua enjoying the sunshine, heat, doing nothing and most of all recovering form the hell of last year.  Recharging my batteries, spending time with family, eating and drinking too much and having a lovely time.  Now this is what a journey is, to distant places and not a journey of cancer, that is a battle .  It’s been a long time coming but it’s amazing to be here and feeling so well.

Some of you might be wondering why it has been so long since i last posted anything, well without all the appointment and treatment my life has gone back to doing chores, cooking, laundry, dealing with kid stuff and general day to day matters.  It’s not that i haven’t wanted to write and i have even got a few posts i started that i will add to this one but somehow i never found the time.  Dreadful excuse but somehow it’s true.

The first post i started writing was in February and here it is,

So February is almost ove and i am still feeling really good. Energy levels still up there, mind getting clearer, weight slowly dropping, and last year is becoming a distant memory.   Saying that though, in a weird way  I feel…I don’t know how to explain it without it sounding strange, something is missing. And I’m not talking about my boobies. I got to meet so many new lovely people and a lot of them I saw on numerous occasions,  becoming friends with them and now I don’t see them anymore and there’s a gap. It suddenly occurs to me what I am feeling. It’s like being made resundant/loosing a job. Suddenly I don’t see these lovely people anymore and I miss them.  Battling breast cancer was my job.  I guess I got a bonus when made resundant, I’m cancer free! 

 I have been re reading my blogs and looking back at it it astounds me how busy I was with appointments, what a rollercoaster of emotions and pains I had and how amazing family and friends were getting me through it. It was a crazy busy time that is now over and normality has returned. Thank god for normal.

The other one i started was on the 11th of. March

Memory foam

It is almost 10 months ago that I had my operation. In that time I spent the first 8 weeks only being able to lie on my back to sleep because of the pain from the scars and ports, plus I was told I had to so everything could have time to heal. Then slowly over the weeks I began to roll onto my sides a few degrees at a time. Although at the time it was frustrating and seemed to take forever there was a point that one day I suddenly realised I was sleeping on my side again and it wasn’t painful anymore. This was a triumph. Until you are unable to sleep in the position that you normally do every night you don’t realise what that position is and how comfortable and instinctive it is. 

Now this sounds all fabulous that I could finally sleep on my side and get some proper sleep, so why am I writing about it now.  10 months down the line and I have a new discovery? I had this lasting and life changing problem that I couldn’t ever see that I was going to be able to resolve. My new boobs, yes  I love them in many ways but being implants with no breast tissue to soften them they are like sleeping with two small balloons filled with sand. They are pretty solid, firm things that if you try to sleep on your tummy do not give or move to the side and are uncomfortable. You find yourself almost balancing, teetering on them pressing into your rib cage. In the beginning I was just pleased I could lie on my side but in the last few months realisation that this is it, the situation won’t be getting any better and I would have to get used to the being perched on these babies if I want to lie on my front had hit me hard and it was a depressing thought . When all of a sudden on Wednesday last week as I was awake at 3.30am getting frustrated I had a rare but bloody brilliant thought. “What about a memory foam matteress topper?”  

The following Day I could be found in Ikea face down on a bed checking out their memory foam mattress toppers. I was that crazy lady, yes face down on a bed gently groaning with delight at the realisation that for the first time in 10 months I could lie on my tummy in comfort, blissfully unaware of the solid boobies I have attached to my front. As the memory foam gave way and moulded around my body it gave way to my implants;  un-bloody believable. Whoever came up with this stuff is a genius and should be given a medal. I almost fell asleep, if it hadn’t have been for other people looking at the bed frame I was on I would have been there for hours. 

I didn’t purchase one from ikea there and then as I had no idea what size bed we have but by Saturday morning the one I purchased from John Lewis was ready for collection. It was collected un wrapped but then had to be left for 24 hours to recover from being  vacuum packed to within an inch of its life, as flat as a pancake. Tonight the memory foam topper was added to our mattress and OMG it is heaven. Like Sleeping on a white fluffy cloud of cotton wool. Why didn’t I think of this sooner. I almost didn’t want to fall asleep. I just wanted to wollow in the bliss I was in. Waking in the night now as I do almost every night I won’t care as I just have to think of the comfort I’m in and I smile. I love you memory foam. My new best friend. 

I have just looked it up and I have NASA to thank. Those clever people at  NASA. THANK YOU.

Now back to today 13.4.19, it’s time i stop this blog and go get me some more sunshine and maybe even a rum punch.  I will defiantly be celebrating this day with a glass of something fizzy at dinner time and also to celebrate Phoebe Littlers 18th Birthday today.  Happy Birthday ( The Horse with the Golden Mane) Phoebe. Xx

Appointments this year…3

Hair Growth, that’s a funny one,  Yes getting longer but so curly it’s becoming a joke.  The body works in weird and not sure if i can say wonderful yet, ways.  The big question is will it straighten or might i have curly hair maybe even ringlets..Who knows watch this space.  All i can say about it right now is i still DO NOT like it an am finding it difficult to get my head araound!!!  If you mention it to my excuse me if i growl at you, you have been warned…. xx

 For now the sun is callling my name, got to go, but i’ll be back soon.

Check those Bumps of yours for those pesky lumps and if you find one go to the Bloody doctor.

One last thing, a MASSIVE Thank you to you all for getting me through the hardest most horrible year ever.  Without you all I couldn’t have done it and one day will repay you all.  I love you. Xxxx